QUESTION:
I am looking for a reflection form for primary students. I know that it won’t be used for a while but I wanted to have something ready.  Can you suggest what one might look like?

RESPONSE:
At the grade one level that I teach, children have very few writing skills, especially at the beginning of the year. Beginning writers find it a challenge to get even a simple idea down on paper.  It requires their full attention and concentration to do so, sounding out letter by letter.  Since it requires such effort to write, I think that my young students would likely view a reflection form as a punishment, for displeasing me.  Instead of that response, I want them to see that I consider misbehavior as an opportunity to learn and grow.   In addition, I wouldn’t want to do anything that would lead children to associate writing with something negative or punishing.

Because the writing process requires such extreme concentration on the part of a young child, I feel that using a reflection form in my early primary classroom might actually defeat the purpose of the form, which is to guide a student in reflection.  If a child’s attention is primarily focused on the act of putting pen to paper, there may not be any “brain-power” left over to fuel self-reflection.  Without self-reflection, there isn’t likely to be true change.  While it’s quite possible that in the future the child may choose to act on Level C more often, he/she may well be motivated by a simple desire to avoid “punishment.”

For these reasons, I find it’s far more in line with my goals to have a personal discussion with a youngster who is misbehaving.  In a discussion I can make sure that self-reflection is the key focus.  If the discussion is likely to be somewhat lengthy, I generally put it off till lunch time or after school.  This isn’t a problem.  Dr. Marshall says that a postponement of the discussion itself actually encourages the process of self-reflection.  It’s only natural that the misbehaving child would automatically start to engage in self-reflection, knowing that a discussion is forthcoming.

Without a doubt, this does take time––usually some of my lunch hour or prep time––but I find it to be time well spent.  I know that this investment will pay off––not only for the student, but for me too.  By dealing thoroughly with a situation, going step-by-step through the reflection form, it’s likely that I’ll spend less time dealing with misbehavior from that same child in the future.  I find these respectful discussions can actually improve my relationships with challenging students.  I benefit because they often become more cooperative and willing to operate at an acceptable level (C.)

In the back of DWS book there is an Appendix titled, “Forms.”  I use the forms on Page 275 and 276 to guide me in my discussion.  At first, I absolutely needed the book open beside me to keep me on track but now I can usually “wing it!”  These forms are meant for older students so I don’t use the exact wording.  I just use them to remind me of the general direction in which I want the conversation to go.

Basically that direction is this:

  • Tell me about what has happened?  What was the problem you created?

This is a great opener for getting the child to think about the fact that the problem didn’t likely just happen to him/her; likely his/her behavior created the problem.

  • On what level were you operating?

If asked in a pleasant way, the child feels no need to self-defend.  Usually they will honestly tell you the correct level.  If not, then more questions help them to arrive at the correct level.  For examples, see DWS p.94.

  • Tell me about why you see yourself at this level?

I want the child to verbalize to me––not the other way around––that what they were doing was unacceptable.  Describing the situation from an understanding of the level,  “I was bumping into people on the monkey bars so they would get off and let me have a turn. That was bossing them around,” promotes ownership of the problem.  The child is acknowledging that what they did was at Level B.

  • Is acting at Level B ever acceptable?

No.

  • How must the teacher treat you on this level?

What kind of a relationship do you have with someone–the teacher or a classmate–when you operate at this level? How are the feelings between us? I want children to realize that they have put themselves into a position of being at loggerheads with me, or the noon-hour supervisor or with another child;  all behavior is a choice.

  • On what level should you have acted?  How would the situation have been different if you had acted on a higher level?

One thing I want them to think about are the relationships that they have with others.  Through the guided questionning strategies, I want them to realize that they are putting these relationships into jeopardy. It’s human nature to want to have friends, want to have teachers like you, want to have the noon-hour supervisor enjoy you company etc.   I feel it’s important to get young people to reflect on their actions.  Using the DWS Hierarchy I can  help them understand that they can choose to create better relations with others, by operating on a higher level.

  • Let’s think about how you might deal with a similar situation in the future.

Perhaps the child needs to come up with a procedure to help them through a similar situation in the future.

OR

  • What should happen now?

If the situation is quite serious and a consequence is deemed necessary then that would be dealt with before going on to discuss a procedure for a future situation.

Most often it doesn’t seem necessary to elicit a consequence for the immediate situation but rather to proactively elicit a future consequence, should the child choose to repeat this same type of misbehavior. Then you’re prepared if it should happen again.  As always, the DWS philosophy is to elicit the consequence from the child with regard to a specific situation, rather than impose it.  As Dr. Marshall says, if the consequence comes from the child, they take ownership––people don’t argue with themselves!  When a child has gone through the process of logically creating a consequence connected to a particular situation, they rarely misbehave again in that way.  They’ve already visualized the situation proactively and can see that it just doesn’t make sense to follow through on that particular plan!  In my experienced, they almost always opt for operating on an acceptable level.

A related posting:

My students are too young to write a reflection sheet.

 

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Posted In: Guided Choices
posted On: August 10, 2009: 11:44 am: By Kerry Weisner
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